Learning to live with a Master Teacher Dog was a big order for my reluctant soprano. She hadn’t a clue about the grand plan attached to my behavior, that I was intentionally reflecting her well-concealed character deficiencies back to her… I had a higher purpose in mind. Playing the role of an obedient, adoring canine companion, or Heaven forbid, a mascot… was not my mission on earth. I was there to teach. I materialized myself (in other words I appeared in full sweet-as-candy puppy disguise) in order force her to reflect upon what she was doing wrong. Specifically my focus was Ms. Em’s inability to live in each moment, to be conscious and aware. I made her an offer she couldn’t refuse (and who could have? I was a wriggling mass of joyous reunion) and we were a team. However, after I got out of that darlin’ ‘lil pup stage… I was fully prepared to show my teeth, to snarl and growl, make a horrendous scene… or play the gracious guru. Whatever lesson the situation demanded, there I was… ready to play rough or to reward. And don’t get me wrong; I am not congratulating myself for my acting ability. I am simply illustrating the role I played for the benefit and spiritual development of narcissistic Ms. Em during her most turbulent years on and off the operatic stage. If you have read Learning to Live with Fritz, you already know that.
Let’s get back to Freddy and the training of a puppy (as taught by many excellent, educated, experienced and well-meaning authors, trainers and canine scientists too). After the Inseeing of The Monks of New Skete and Cesar Millan’s rigorous pack-leader techniques, I highly recommended (whispered emphatically) to Ms. Em that yet another enlightening and entertaining ‘dog book’ might be interesting to her and definitely helpful in bringing up her new pup.
THE GENIUS OF DOGS: HOW DOGS ARE SMARTER THAN YOU THINK
By Brian Hare & Vanessa Woods
I found author Peggy Tibbetts review on the Goodreads website to be far better than anything I could think up as a description of content and intention of the book The Genius of
Dogs.Ruggedly handsome Dr. Brian Hare (Dr. Brian Hare is associate professor of evolutionary anthropology at Duke University) creator of Dognition and the stunning Vanessa Woods
(Australian scientist, author and journalist- feature writer for the Discovery Channel) researched and wrote together. The cool thing about this is that they could argue and edit the manuscript without ever leaving home since they are married to each other! Read how they got together in Vanessa’s fascinating book The Bonobo Handshake.
Now this is quite a trick. Can you imagine it? An in-home scene: a bathroom … the shower is running … Miss Woods is shouting over the noise of cascading water: “Darling? What do you think about Chapter 10? I am not happy with the leading paragraph … Sweetheart … are you in there?” Somehow this beautiful couple, each with their separate successful careers joining forces to write an entertaining and still very serious and scientific book about the intelligence of dogs sparked my memory.
No one who has ever watched a Thin Man film could forget “America’s favorite Mister and Missus” … Nick and Nora Charles. Along with their snappy repartee they were often chatting about and interacting with Asta, their clever fox terrier whom they both (and the American cinema-going public) adored.
For a laugh watch Asta: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKLCAHVKb0w
Yes, it’s all about LOVE. Hare and Woods are two young scientists who got together because of their love of animals. This love combined with their knowledge and individual research brought forth an excellent manuscript. In the case of Ms. Em it was not really her love of dogs that propelled her forward. She was traumatized into writing a book about her experiences with me and her book was an exercise in trying to figure out why I acted the way I did. Exit Fritz. Enter Freddy. The seven years between us has contributed to her understanding of what I was up to while on the earth plane doing what I did best: intimidate! In the interim E. has read more than her share of books about dogs, puppy training and general information about canis lupus familiaris, the domestic dog.
Even though Bolonka baby Freddy has proven time and again that he has no talent for aggressive teaching skills, I can tell that Ms. Em is still fearful. She has persuaded herself that after the honeymoon is over (pup with his puppy mom) that Freddy might turn out to be … well, another Fritz. She is SO frightened that she almost made another huge mistake: spending too much time studying! I stepped in just in the nick of time and reminded her of the greatest truth of all… LOVE. You can read and study and watch DVD’s all you want but every one of those activities occur somewhere else. Do you know what I am getting at? That somewhere else is not living in the NOW. All the time you are spending reading, watching or listening … even making lists and vowing to be the perfect puppy parent… you are not spending time WITH your puppy in the present moment. All you need is love. Think about it. LOVE always occurs right now. Spend TIME NOW with your pup.
Dr. Hare has the right idea about being here now with your canine companions. His intelligence tests can help you classify and thus better understand what type of genius your dog might be. A charmer, an independent thinker … Oh, I could go on about this but since a video is worth a million words … just watch this report from ABC news about Dognition.
Now I really have a bone to pick (pun intended) with the USA rules and regulations about pets flying with their beloved human companions in airplanes. And while I am at it… especially in the United States of America… (land of the free? This certainly does not apply to dogs in airports). Since my nutty mistress Ms. Em was usually singing and traveling with me in pet-friendly Europe, I was totally unaware of the hateful rules against traveling dogs (and only occasionally… cats) in the continental United States.
My dears, you won’t believe this and I will only relate one small tale of woe, exactly as it happened. If I still had all my paws I would jump up and down… enough to lose my balance up here and fall right through this cloud of mine. Watching the sad spectacle of Freddy become a victim of Pet In Cabin. Oh how he suffered. And now I tell the tale:
E. booked a flight (per telephone you can’t book over the Internet for Pet In Cabin) to Ohio. She was happy enough to find out that the Pet in Cabin status was available for her flights from Europe to the USA and back. Freddy could fly with her for a mere 200 Euro which calculated in USD is a whopping $266.08. She was so relieved for puppy Freddy (who is really too young to leave his mum) that she asked in a cheerful voice… if the 200 Euro was a round trip fee. “Oh no, this is the one way fare for a Pet In Cabin.” …was the reply the astonished Ms. Em received from the polite and helpful airline representative. “You mean I will be paying 532.16 dollars for a round trip for my pet????” I will not record here the rest of this conversation because the result was that Freddy’s mum had to pay. She had no choice. She had to make the trip to Ohio and she had to take Freddy. No arguments. She paid.
However, paying was not the source of Freddy’s discomfort, his endless suffering… no. We dogs don’t have any financial sense. We don’t care. Why should we? We care about our humans. We care about our supper dish. We care about playing games and protecting our families. We also care about taking a pee when it is necessary and appropriate. The inhumane rules and regulations in the airplanes, the restrictions and out-and-out unfairness played out in US airports… all of this is what made Freddy’s flights simple nightmares.
Imagine this: Let’s take advice from the Monks of New Skete and do some INSEEING here, a true be-here-now exercise. Pretend you are a 4 lb. puppy, just about twelve inches long and eight inches tall. You love your travel case, it has been your home since your new parents adopted you. You spent your first night away from your mother in it and slept on the blanket your siblings played upon for your first eight weeks of life … so it smelled like home from the beginning. You love your special container so much that you have never whimpered or cried while zipped up inside your airy and comfortable Original Sherpa Deluxe™ Carrier created for air travel. No, never once have you complained or begged to get out.
Now you … the happy puppy in your comfortable air carrier have traveled silently, slept off and on since your voluntary incarceration in Stuttgart, Germany. In the airport there you frolicked about, ran and jumped, greeted all the other dogs in the large airport either traveling or accompanying their humans for the necessary goodbyes. You also got a long walk around the terminal grounds to do your business, to relive yourself before the long nine-hour flight to America. You arrive and wake up sleepily, still quietly assuming you will soon be freed to walk about and take that ever increasingly necessary pee-pee break. Your ‘mom’ goes through the US Customs line which takes not too long… really… and the Agriculture officers are quite nice to you as they peek into your carrier and take a quick look at your credentials: That is… your EU Passport and make sure you have had all your vaccinations. Still you are quiet and content knowing that it can’t be long now…
Wrong. You hear your mistress, your mom (Ms. Em) asking an airline official where she can take you out. You feel your primary caretaker bristle with anger when she is told that she cannot leave the building with you, that there is no service for employees of the airline to ‘take a dog a walk’ and that she is also not allowed to remove you (for any reason) from your ‘cage.’ The (sort of smug) airline official also pointed to the little green tag attached to your carrier which reinforced the fact that removing an animal from its carrier in an airport or on an airplane is ILLEGAL and that there will be hell to pay (or a hefty fine) if one disregards this warning. There is a three hour wait in this hateful, loud, chaotic place for the next flight which will also be an endurance test of about 1.5 hours.
Lets make this long story shorter: In the airport Ms. Em was intimidated enough to feel forced to obey the rules and puppy Freddy suffered in silence. However, on the flight to Ohio he couldn’t restrain his dismay any longer and he began to cry pitifully, whining and begging to be allowed out of his cage. Poor E. was beside herself. She looked around for any airline personnel that might inhibit her progress as she carried Freddy to the tiny onboard restroom and locked that door. Then she triumphantly unzipped the bag and let the miserable animal out onto the pee-pee pad she laid out on the floor. It was a tight squeeze in there but nothing could compare with the happiness of this moment of freedom both Ms. Em and her Freddy felt then and there.
The trip back to Europe was more eventful and even more distressing since after a while poor Freddy had an idea about what was to come. All was well until the pilot announced that a storm was brewing, that the plane had to wait it out … and this took 2 hours while patient Freddy remained taciturn in his friendly carrier. When the pilot announced to the hot and chagrined passengers that they might miss their next connections Freddy started to cry, and so loudly that the Steward warned Ms. Em that she might not be able to get on her long overseas flight with such a yowling animal! E. begged the man not reveal this to anyone officially… that she would calm her dog… somehow. Since she knew Freddy only had to pee… when they landed, she took him into the women’s restroom, spread out the pee-pee-pad and allowed him his relief. This covert action got the attention of a washroom cleaning lady who declared in a loud voice: “This will be a $500 fine for you lady!” E. scooped up Freddy and the (completely dry on the bottom) pee-pee-pad and showed the complainer how sanitary it was for her little dog to do his business in this manner in this restroom . She convinced the cleaner who told her in no uncertain terms that she better get OUT right now or she would have to ‘call the authorities.’. E. left immediately with zipped in Freddy and thankfully was allowed onto her flight back to Europe where dogs and doggie needs are respected far more than they (apparently) are in the good old USA.
Well, I did it. I got puppy Freddy picked out, picked up and taken home in spite of E.’s nervousness about the entire gigantic (it took seven years for me to convince her) project. This is Ms. Em’s chance to do it right this time instead of producing (through her crass know-it-all tendencies) another crazy little dog. Almost all dog trainers, whisperers and psychologists agree that it is never the dog creating the behaviors these experts are called in to analyze and/or to remedy. In Learning to Live with Fritz the dizzy diva plays a mea culpa role. She freely admits all the errors in her thinking and takes full credit for the emotional traumas she unwittingly caused
(her dog Fritz) in attempting to explain why I turned out the way I did. I was the despotic, dominant, Boss Dog who taught her how to love unconditionally. I pushed her to her limits. I entered her life with my eccentric and willful personality fully trained … but as a strict teacher … never as a dog. I have to admit, I did a sublime job on my unwilling student. In the end (by Jove !) she got it
Since I have been concerned about the new pup in E.’s life, and her certain influence over the innocent creature’s developing personality … I took a worldwide survey of dog trainers, dog lovers, dog books etc. until I had the answer to a very important question: Who has compiled, through experience and dedication, the perfect attitude on training a puppy? What E. advises in (our) Chapter Five: Name the Puppy, Train the Puppy … is basically how not to train a new canine family member. Quite a lot of her advice is astute, usable and admirably self-critical. However, the analysis of mistakes (often genuinely hilarious) and the conclusions drawn from a woman’s misadventures with one preprogrammed pup was not answering my question.
Wherever I looked for the perfect training manual … I found shortcomings and a serious neglect of the one most important element in the human-dog
relationship. The spiritual aspect that (like it or not, accept it or not) exists between a dog and his “owner.” Finally I found what I was looking for from the profoundly spiritual and utterly practical Monks of New Skete and their publications. BINGO! Everything I wanted E. to know has been researched and illustrated in a manuscript revised and updated in 2002. I have to admit that I scanned the reviews for the one I liked best. Library Journal says it all: “How to Be Your Dog’s Best Friend is the most readable book on the dog training for the layman that this reviewer has come across. Any person who has ever thought of owning a dog should read this engaging book from cover to cover.” I have to agree. Imagine how delighted I was upon discovering that the monks have also published a book entitled The Art of Raising a Puppy!
Granted, Ms. Em has pleased me with her courage to go the distance on her (my) dream. I can’t say that enough since it was my idea. I worked diligently to persuade her to see why the puppy project was essential for her continued lessons in living in the present moment. On the other hand … I have observed brand new errors in judgment as she attempts to train her beloved Freddy. Trying her best to please the new arrival (already a big mistake) she has unwittingly taught her pup a new word (and unfortunately the incomparable taste of) ‘chicken’ – Freddy has become a trembling mass of insistent instant gratification. Unfortunately for Ms. Em (extended kitchen duty) Freddy is now a genuine chickaholic and refuses all food presented in his supper dish without the expected freshly cooked chicken breast chopped small and sprinkled over the top of his Royal Canin mini bites for puppies.
This is for you Freddy:
My dear Pup,
You have probably noticed that the lady who took you away from your mother completely adores you but is at this time … acting a bit neurotic. You are about to be saved from the ineptness of a frightened mistress trying her best to please you and make you her friend. This is all wrong! She now has come full circle and is sure that she does not know it all … now she is afraid that she knows nothing! Have pity on her. She is thoroughly confused. She is especially nervous about your training and about how you
will turn out. Please understand that in her present state of agitation that it is impossible for her to do anything right. She will be making major mistakes with you. My only advice is: Relax. The cavalry is coming. I will find a way to get her to buy (or download) the above mentioned books, and this time … read them.
Your true friend,
One month later our ‘Raiko vom Sonneneck’ was a nearly nine week old Bolonka baby and it was time for E. and her husband to pick up Freddy. Yes, in the meantime milady had to ‘fess up and tell all’. Surprisingly her Big Baritone was not at all displeased! The first thing I whispered to puppy Freddy (while he was still a twinkle in Merlin’s eye) was that his main mission in life was to bond absolutely with needy Ms. Em. She had suffered enough dealing with me and my difficult daily lessons in being here now.
(Aside: In my lifetime I was in love with the man of the house. It was close to an embarrassing sort of hero worship for the Big International Baritone … but as I have intimated before … it was all for Ms. E’s good. She needed to learn how to love unconditionally, even when she was not the object of love returned. Read the book to get the real story on that.)
However, with this little pooch I am determined that Ms. Em’s story is going to be different. This pup (with my intense whisperings and on-the-scene guidance) will without a doubt be a momma’s boy. I arranged the pickup trip, invited a family friend Rainer along to sit in the passenger’s seat along with his very own male Bolonka, Sammy. This was my genius idea to distract from Freddy’s sure fascination with E.s husband. I figured that then she could have the back seat to herself for the sole purpose of bonding; to become the Ersatzmutter to little frightened Freddy. Frightened? Yes. How would you feel watching three of your siblings taken away by large baby-talking, cooing strangers? How would you feel if you were one of the last two puppies left to beloved but strict Momma Felice … awaiting your fate?
I promise this is the last time I will steal a bit from E’s personal journal but she was closer to the situation than I. You’ll have to admit … it reads nicely ….
“The day was bright and sunny as we drove off to the Nabinger home in Sonneneck where the same five lady-Bolonkas awaited our arrival. Again a glorious chorus of barking greeted us. Halleluja! Honestly, I was so nervous I could barely utter a word. It seemed to take forever until we got to see our darling (now five weeks older and more himself) at close range. Freddy was standing alone inside the large airy knee-high cage. He was looking up at us and was better than any photo. There he was! Finally Freddy!
Freddy’s gaze told me he was a cute little bundle of love, full of spunk and fun, a handful to tame … with a dash of determined cleverness and skepticism thrown in for good measure. The instant I saw him again I thought of Bel Mooney’s wonderful memoir: A Small Dog Saved my Life (www.belmooney.co.uk). I wondered if Freddy might change my life. I surely don’t need saving but this snarky little critter might be exactly what I need to get back to myself … the self I lost along the way somewhere in the chaotic years after Fritz was no longer with us. The rush of loving feelings overcame all my rational thought processes as I scooped up my treasure.
I became one with this perfect moment. I was finally and once again here now with the tiny fellow I held in my (not so steady) hands. Everything to this innocent creature was brand new, exciting, interesting … alive and shining. This Freddy was an expert in living in this moment. I was elevated to a new level of consciousness: Pure bliss.
Finally, after Simone Nabinger placed the spanking new halter (much to his chagrin and surprise) and leash on Freddy, we were off with our prize. One poignant moment did occur when Mama Felice seemed to be saying a uncomprehending sort of adieu to her penultimate offspring. As we led him off to our awaiting automobile Felice followed Freddy for just a moment and then seemed to shake her head as she walked slowly back to her home.
Then Freddy was ours. I sat in the backseat cuddling the trembling little fellow who kept trying to find a way to climb out of the speeding steel enclosure. He squeaked a bit here and there but all things considered; I had expected a much more dramatic first drive in a car. I was determined that Freddy’s first experience in an automobile would not be anything like the one I produced for the twelve week old Fritz (Fritznote: See Chapter Five; Learning to Live with Fritz -page 26, paragraph 2 ).
Finally we had our baby at home. He stepped out of his carrier acting just like he owned the place. And then we were once again … three! After seven years without a dog in the house or accompanying us on trains, boats and trains around the world … in virtually every important opera house in the world … we were a triumvirate. Yes … as we were before … I could see it coming: three different military leaders, all claiming to be the sole leader … Oh! … but what FUN!”
In keeping with my Be Here Now raison d’etre, I was relentless in my insistence. I could see that Ms.Em, if not suffering from a certified case of digital dementia was at least a victim of digital delusion. She was spending too much time in the cyber world marketing our book Learning to Live with Fritz to BE HERE NOW! She was forgetting all the lessons I had taught her. In order to remind her of what is real and what living in the present moment means, I whispered, then suggested, then cajoled and finally gave up and commanded in my big boss Mafia voice: Get a PUPPY!” E. finally heard me. The idea became a passion … and suddenly was bigger than both of us.
Freddy entered the Earth Plane on January 4, 2013. He was born under the sign of traditionally headstrong but socially adept Capricorn. Freddy should turn out to be a sweet-tempered (if stubborn and social climbing) lapdog. I definitely was NOT nor would I ever wish to fit into the lapdog category. How could I sacrifice the necessary authoritarian position I earned on the earth plane … to sit placidly on anyone’s lap or to look soulfully into a pair of human eyes? No way.
At long last I got E. into her car and on the road to Weidenthal-Sonneneck in the Pfalz region of Germany (lovely photos on this website: http://www.weidenthal.de/gastinfo.htm ) for her first visit with Freddy. What a thrill! E. was so excited that I was worried about her ability to remain in control of her automobile. It was on this first drive that I gave her the pup’s designated name: I whispered …
This should have calmed her hysteria. It did not. Give me a few points for trying. Nevertheless, relentless doubts assailed her mind as she got closer to that first secret meeting. Ms. Em was so worried about this trip. She had told no living soul, not even her husband … what she was up to. Even with the wonderful beneficent new name I chose for the pup, E. was a nervous wreck. I guess I really did a job on her psyche when I was still pretending to be a dog.
On the German Autobahn, I kept reassuring my reluctant puppy mom that she was getting all green lights from The Universe on this trip. (Yes, I had to make it this dramatic. I listed all the positive signs: the February roads were clear, no traffic jams, no snow, rain or fog to inhibit her progress etc.) She finally reached Sonneneck, pulled up in front of Langeckerstr.12, the Nabinger residence and … but why should I describe her first covert meeting with puppy Freddy when I can take an easier route? Here is a look inside Ms. Em’s personal journal where the ex-diva describes her puppy love at first sight experience with four week old Freddy.
“I knew it was now or never. I rang the Nabinger’s doorbell. Somehow the chorus of five barking Bolonkas was music to my ears. Bernd Nabinger, a tall, dark haired friendly sort opened the door. Bernd then introduced me to his wife Sabine whose dimpled cheeks and a hearty laugh convinced me I was in the right place. They led me into the ‘nursery’; their spacious living room. A huge playpen contained five softly snoring puppies. I took the viewer’s chair sat down. I was very nervous. Sabine picked Freddy up and delicately handed me the tiny lump of white fur.
He was as light as a potato chip! Freddy immediately began to shiver. At first I took this as a negative sign– was he ill, was he cold? No, he was hungry. This could have been the reason for Freddy shivering the first time he met me but then again it could have been a shivering of recognition?
Felice (a beautiful gray and white ladydog) sprang into the playpen fully intent on nursing all five of her offspring. Freddy was the first on the nipple and drank with gusto. Yes, no, yes, no … should I or shouldn’t I say yes to this pup? I had already been instructed to name him Freddy by my ever-present mentor Fritz. My husband knew nothing about my secret mission. I shoved that thought to the back of my mind the minute I learned that Freddy’s sire had the name of MERLIN! Ha! Now this was a definite good sign!
This darling Mr. Magic … named Merlin is the father of my Be Here Now instructor. Sold! I had passed the Nabinger’s inspection with flying colors especially after I held up my copy of Learning to Live with Fritz. I put my 200 Euro down, signed a contract and as a final test I sang the opening lines of Tosca* in my highest loudest soprano singing: “Mario, Mario , Mario…” I had to know if Freddy would react negatively to opera singing. Freddy passed the test. He didn’t move a muscle. He looked up at me adoringly. What a joy to know that Freddy will be able to tolerate sudden loud singing noises since his future will involve quite a lot of that. Now I shall have to confess to my big baritone since Freddy is a reality and will become part of our lives. How will I do it? I am not sure. However, what I am sure of is that I will be counting every minute of the next five weeks until I can take little Raiko (Freddy) vom Sonneneck home.”
Now I ask you, what can I add to that?
E.Rawlins sings Tosca on her You Tube channel